You Are Your Own Teacher

OM

Namah Shivaya Gurave

I offer myself to the Light, the Auspicious One,

Who is the True Teacher within and without,

Saccidananda Murtaye

Who assumes the forms of Reality, Consciousness and Bliss,

Nisprapancaya Shantaya

Who is never absent and is full of peace,

Niralambaya Tejase

Independent in existence, the vital essence of illumination.

OM

I love the Anusara chant, because, as a singer, it's one of my favorite melodies to sing...and in a typical Anusara class we get to sing it three times :)  But what I love most about it is that it reminds us that consciousness, the energy of the universe, the one and only teacher, is in everyone and everything. In fact, it is everyone and it is everything.

“If you know how to listen, everyone is the guru.” – Ram Dass

Ironically, the founder of Anusara has come under accusations and has stepped down from his Anusara throne because of "scandals" he's been involved with.  People loved John Friend. I've been to classes of his where students are piled on top of each other's mats because of overcrowding.  His classes were fun, spiritual, creative and heart-filled.  I learned long ago, however, that it's okay to revere someone - but not obsess over them - and to take their teachings with a grain of salt.   They're human, just like you. They make mistakes. They have imperfections.

"When the hurt disappears, the realization might just dawn that it's okay to separate the teacher from the teaching. When someone sidesteps, there's no need to throw out the baby with the bathwater. That teacher inspired us because he/she brought something valuable to the world -- at least for a while. Whatever that valuable teaching/inspiration was, however long it continues to uplift and inform us, that has a value in and of itself."

Eva Norlyk Smith, Ph.D. from a post of hers in the Huffington Post

It's great to have a teacher or a "guru" that you admire if he or she is someone you feel comfortable with and from whom you love learning. I think it's important to have someone in your life you can go to and trust, or if they're a teacher who's not accesible to you, someone who at least you can learn from through readings, lectures and the like.  But once you take all these teachings into your home practice of yoga postures and meditation, you become your own instructor. After all - the very purpose of yoga is to unite the individual self with the divine...and to do this, as Ram Dass says, you must listen - to yourself - and everything around you.

You can always learn something from everyone you meet.  You may not agree with everything someone does or says, but it's what you take from interacting with them - what may resonate with that intuition inside of you - that makes you your own teacher.  Your own intuition is older, more wiser than intellect. When you were born, you first felt your intuition without relying on all that "learned intellect." Your intuition, especially if you cultivate it in positive ways, is almost always more reliable. If you think about it, you have the knowledge of the entire universe and the cosmos within you...how can you not?! And what could be more reliable than that?!

"Being human is never easy. But that's the point....Hex me with all the bland management jargon in the world, zap me with all the perfect theories and models you like, but I'll never, ever accept the idea that triviality, mediocrity, and futility are appropriate goals for any human being, much less our grand, splintering systems of human organization."

Umair Haque, from a post of his in the Harvard Business Review Blog

Looking around me, listening to daily conversations of passersby, colleagues, friends, watching posts online, I wonder how many people are settling for mediocrity. I wonder how many people are fine with being told what to do instead of actively seeking out knowledge, listening to their inner purpose and letting it shine.  I know I feel much more purposeful - more like I'm contributing to the positive energy of the universe - when I make an effort to do what I love; just a little...every day. 

Not sure what your life calling is? Sit in silence and listen. Repeat the mantra, "Om mani padme hum" to yourself to quiet your mind. Be aware of your universal energy and trust it.

To sum up one of the Buddha's many tenets, every "teaching" the Buddha ever delivered was only for you to understand your own true "Buddha nature".  Every buddha that ever lived was just like you and I that had a materialistic, egotistical, dillusional outlook on life.  When the buddha  became enlightened and spoke to his disciples, it was only to remind you of the teacher already inside of you. To harness that, you have to listen more. Quiet your mind. Trust yourself.

So today start listening to yourself.  Listen to those around you. Inspire yourself and inspire the world around you. Never stop learning. You are your own teacher. 

Namaste.

 Photo by Ashley Daige of  http://www.daigestudio.com

Bodhicitta - Get your Givin' on

I once heard an olympic athlete say in an interview that he doesn't let a day go by without training, physically and mentally, to be the absolute best that he is humanly capable of being.


Imagine if we all thought like that? Imagine instead of waking up, rolling out of bed, feeding our pets, driving to work half asleep with a drive-through coffee cup warming our hands, staring at a computer screen for 8 hours, driving home, making dinner, sitting in front of the TV, feeding our pets, and going to bed - we changed it up a little?


It's hard for me to get up every day and do a little home practice of yoga.  My bed and tempurpedic mattress are 2 things I look forward to every night...and every morning when I hit the snooze button and snuggle into them for another 15...ok...30....okay, fine 45 minutes.  What brings me to my mat, though? The memory of how much better I feel on those days that I do yoga.  Conditioning my body and mind daily for the past several years has resulted in a pattern that is now hard to break.  And "conditioning" is the key word here.


We can condition our bodies and minds to do just about anything we tell them or show them.  On many occasions, upon hearing me speak french or italian, two languages I learned well after my adolescent years, people often remark, "I always wanted to learn another language but it's too late - I'm too old." Or when I explain to people who are constantly complaining of stiff joints, muscles and ligaments that a slow, steady practice of yoga will surely benefit them, I hear often, "Start yoga at this age? I can't even bend over! I'm not flexible - I'd be horrible at it."


We tend to do things we are used to doing - things that are part of our routine - things we are comfortable with.  And then we are bothered if this routine is interrupted.  We also think we don't have any time to do anything outside of our routine. Practicing Bodhicitta will rid you of that feeling of being "bothered" at all and might even allow you to break your old habits and integrate some new ones into your life.  To explain bodhicitta (bow-dee-chee-ta), the following quote:

"Boundless joy is the joy you should feel when you see gifted and learned beings who are happy, famous or influential. Instead of feeling uneasy and envious of their good fortune, rejoice sincerely, thinking, "May they continue to be happy and enjoy even more happiness!" Pray too that they may use their wealth and power to help others,...performing...worthwhile deeds. Rejoice and make a wish: "May they never lose all their happiness and privileges. May their happiness increase more and more, and may they use it to benefit others...."

Pray that your mind may be filled with boundless equanimity, loving-kindness, compassion and joy--as boundless as a Bodhisattva's. If you do so, genuine bodhichitta will certainly grow within you."

p.49) --from The Excellent Path to Enlightenment, by Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche, translated and edited by The Padmakara Translation Group, published by Snow Lion Publications

My father always said, when I felt bad or dumb for not knowing something, "You know what you know and you don't know what you don't know." Simple, eh? We're all on different paths in this life and you can't judge someone for not knowing something that you may know...because it's almost certain that they have knowledge of something that you lack. Why not create bodhicitta and reach out to share what you know, instead?


In many of the spiritual texts I have read, it states over and over that without developing bodhicitta, spiritual growth cannot be attained.  It also feels damn good to help a brotha or a sista out. :)
Didn't have a date for Valentine's Day? Spread the love! Instead of pouting like 5 million other people on this planet, be the one that helps one of those Debbie Downers feel better about being on this earth.

It is very easy to be jealous of somebody.  It is very easy to compare ourselves to others and to want something - the job, the life, the relationship - that someone else has.  It is very easy to keep things only for yourself. But what we are doing when we are focusing our energy on these types of things is just that: giving our energy away to somebody else and creating negative energy inside ourselves. 

What if we practiced sharing our knowledge and congratulating others on their positive force in the world?

Imagine if we could diminish that feeling we get when something doesn't turn out as expected.  Imagine if we were never disappointed in anyone.  There's a way to practice this.  During a time when normally you would expect your husband or your friends or your family to do something for you, turn that expectation around and beat them to it.  Instead of waiting, hoping and wishing for gifts or accolades, give to somebody instead. Give your love, give a gift, cook a meal, lend a hand.  If we ask for something we want or think we might need, this actually diminishes our boddhicitta. 

This week - try to add a little giving to your routine. Buy a coffee for somebody else.  Let somebody go ahead of you in traffic. Get up early and do a little yoga sequence for yourself (this will help others, believe me!) Smile. Say good morning...and mean it.  Condition yourself to make giving part of your daily agenda and to be the best that you are capable of being. You'll be surprised what good things will come. 

"Silhouette of Autumn" by Ashley Daige of  http://www.daigestudio.com

                                                          

Namaste

The Acu-High - Driver Recommended

It's been an interesting yoga year for me.  The moment I started on a new path-yogically speaking-I noticed a new sensation in my shoulder. Yea, that's what I'll call it - a sensation.  I was very aware of this shoulder sensation when I signed up for a 4-day yoga extravaganza back in June.  But I did it anyway.  I was drawn to this festival: yoga from 8-5, over 8 sessions to choose from, all day long? Yes, please.
Because of where I live, a community where most of the yoga studios teach only one specific kind of yoga, I have kind of been pigeon-holed into this certain type that is in love with "chaturangas".  Chaturanga Dandasana = Four-Limbed Staff Pose = mucho amounts of pushups.  Don't get me wrong, I love pushups and love having the lean, musculur arms that come with doing them....if they are taught properly. 

After realizing there was more to yoga postures than just practicing chaturangas, I started to really focus on my alignment. "Alignment." Huh.  I don't think I'd ever heard that word uttered in a class I'd taken up until now. I don't know much about anatomy, but it would make sense that, before you move into a challenging posture, one would want to align the body correctly so as to avoid all possibilities of injury.
As I began un-learning postures that had been engrained in my head over the past 10 years and re-learning them the correct way, the sensations in my body became more pronounced: lighter, better, but I kept coming across blockages: tightness in my elbow, kinks in my back, a stiff IT band. 

I do this stretch at night, while laying on my back, that "cracks" every vertebra as I roll my back against the floor.  When my chiropractor found a knot in my back, he asked if I was doing any kind of twist or stretch that would crack my back.  When I told him what I do and how good it feels to release that tightness he responded, "What you're doing is aligning your back in an incorrect way.  I'm releasing that tightness as well, but back into the correct alignment."

By finally practicing postures and techniques that made sense to my body, my "old" body was saying, "Wait a minute....I'm stuck!" So what do I do now?

Weeks of physical therapy helped to strengthen, but didn't seem to get at the root of the problem. Massage is a quick fix but it seems to revert back to the same old problems once I start exercising and posturing. What's next?! Do I have to spring for an MRI?  I play the mandolin and I have shows coming up! I can't afford surgery!!!  Hmmm....something to remove the blockages....

Acupuncture.  And when you need needles stuck in you at an affordable price, where do you go? Portsmouth Community Acupuncture, where you can lay comfortably in an armchair with a man snoring in another one right by your side. Ahhhhhh.

I told the acupuncturist about my three main problem areas. She listened intently as she mulled over in her mind where she was going to place the little needles into my flesh like a voodoo doll. When I finally made it over to the big plush armchair, she started by placing the first needle on my collar bone, then moved to the muscle right above my collar bone, my sternum, forearms, hands, calves, feet, and even forehead and hairline. When she left the room I felt the effects immediately.  There was a liquidy-feeling to my arm. Then it turned hot. Then seemed to go numb. Then it was heavy.  I felt the sensation radiate to my left foot - somehow it seemed to relate. I moved my head slightly at one point to adjust myself.  My deltoid muscle throbbed.  "Wow," I thought...my qi (chee) is doing some funky shit."

I lay for the next hour reciting "om mani pad mi hum", to myself, which was interrupted by a few passing thoughts and muscles twitches.

To explain the new sensation I felt after being pin-pricked, I'll compare it to what i know best:  After a steady, flowing yoga class, and a nice, relaxing savasana, you feel a "yogi-high" and walk around smiling with a feeling of bliss all day...or, at least until you leave the studio :)

This was different.  I felt foggier, but still light. Things had shifted. Emotions had been released. Physical sensations were apparant. Certain limbs actually felt stiffer, then, when I moved them, lighter. I chatted with Emily for a while about next steps, how long it would take to feel results, etc. What she didn't mention, however, was that I should have called for a driver. 

I decided to take a ride out to the outlets, since I was already out and about, as I had heard about a mega coat sale.  Now I've lived in this area for over ten years.  I know the streets like the back of my hand. The outlets are less than ten minutes away from where my car was parked.  I left the parking lot, then took four wrong turns before I finally made it to the outlet which ended up being closed. Four wrong turns - as if I was a complete stranger to the neighborhood and was reading directions upside-down off a scrap paper in the dark.  My mind seemed to shut off and my body was just floating around in the ethers of Acu-land. I was so glad the store was closed.  I was a danger to the roads, and I probably would have tried to buy more than I needed. 

I went home, made a quick dinner, and relaxed for the rest of the night.  I looked up: "Acupuncture: What you need to know after a treatment." http://www.chenqiang.net/After%20acupuncture%20reactions.htm
I related particularly to this statement: "Some may notice their body was floating, as if they were weightless, or on the contrary, they felt heavy, as if their body was sinking into the bed," and was glad to know that a little cloudiness was normal after reading that "Some patients would become more emotionally sensitive for a short period of time. One could cry for no reason; grief for something that happened long ago; can't tolerate other people."  Feeling bitchy at work? No problem. Just tell your colleagues you've come from acupuncture. They'll understand.

I've already made a second appointment for next week. My qi is ready.

Open to Something Greater

I've always loved learning.  I remember my dad saying once during one of our talks before he tucked me in as a child, as he saw stars and curiosity in my eyes, "Don't worry about not learning everything in this world - there is SO much to know!" and I also remember being determined to prove him wrong.  (But then the math section on the SATs came along....)

But really this determination to know everything became not as important, and yet, much more attainable in a way, when I began studying yoga:
"Education is the drawing out of the best that is within a person." Light on Yoga - B.K.S. Iyengar.

Have you ever had a teacher that you absolutely respected and really remember learning from? A trainer that guided you to do your best and "do it yourself?" I think we learn best by doing, and as teachers, the best thing we can give to our students is to let them understand their full potential by giving them tools to figure it out themselves.

As teachers and as students, we can start to understand our full potential by opening our hearts to something greater - something greater than how our job defines us - something greater than how our families see us - something greater than the limited concept of ourselves. (Thanks John Friend :) )

I've felt a crazy urge to play music recently, as work obligations have prevented me from having the time to play as much as I've wanted.  I've needed to change my mandolin strings for about a month.  Last night, while tuning, a prong that holds one of my strings down onto a metal bracket snapped off.  Time to head to the music store. I had always relied on musician friends to help me out when I was in such a jam.  They just knew the instruments so much better than me! I'm just one of those singer types! But last night I finally headed to the store and when the nice man behind the counter offered to help, I couldn't wait to watch him like a hawk and soak in all the knowledge I could - how to clean the wood properly, how to re-string it correctly (so much more complicated than a guitar!), how to match up the "open G" with the enharmonic tone of the 12th fret to determine if the bridge should be moved up or down.... 

Yoga helps me remember, with every breath I'm conscious of breathing, and with every posture to which I give my full intention, to open my heart fully to new experiences, but especially to honor what it is my heart wants. 

If you ever feel "stuck" in a situation life throws at you, open to something greater.  Figure out exactly what it is you want to do, want to learn, want to express, and tell the world - and be heard. Be open to learn from people who you once may have thought were less intelligent than you. Be open to learn from those younger than you.  Learn from their actions.  Learn from their mistakes.  We have all just been on different paths and all have something to share.

A yogi friend said to me recently, "Every being on this earth is meant to shine their light and do exactly what it is that makes them happy."

Whenever I feel stuck or unhappy I tell myself, "I deserve to be happy" and I start to do the things I love.  I make time and make space in my day just for me.  I might not be able to know everything in the world, but if I follow my heart, do the things I love to do, stay on my path and learn from those experiences, I will draw out the very best of me.  And I'll still be open to something greater...always.



Courtesy of Ashley Daige http://www.daigestudio.com/

 Namaste.

What do I Want to Create Here?

"We live to be the Creators and to be the Enjoyers of happiness, good health, beauty and love."

What happens to us when we are in conflict? What is happening to us when we are thinking about seeking revenge? What is happening when we are sad and dwelling on a negative thought?

Our mind is causing us suffering.

Yoga is not just a practice of physical poses.  That is a small fraction of it.  It has nothing to do with flexibility.  In fact, most people who are too flexible end up with injuries because of hyper-extension of joints.  It is a daily, monthly and lifelong journey.  Coming on to our mats is just a reminder to cultivate not only the strength of our bodies, but to also cultivate our minds and our hearts.  How do we do that?

Have you ever had a bad day and when someone comes to ask you how you're doing, you just tell them to go away so you can be alone with your thoughts? ooooooh, this is dangerous!  Think about what you're doing.  You are allowing your negative thoughts to grow.  Instead, to create a positive way of thinking, all you have to do is come to your mat.  Watch your breath.  Concentrate on the breath going in.....and going out.  Are you still in your head? Try some movement with your breath.  Get on your hands and knees.  Breathe in and reach your head and chest up towards the sky and point your butt up in the opposite direction.  Cow pose.  Breathe out and do the opposite - arch your back, pushing your hands into the ground.  Cat pose.  Do this 10 times.  Voila.  You just created some space in your mind.

Asanas, or postures, came about - so the story goes - after cave-dwelling monks who sat and meditated for hours and days on end started getting numb asses.  They started observing animals and how they move after getting up from rest and realized that they could still breathe and watch their breath but with movement.  But the point was still to watch the breath, clear the mind, connect the individual with the universal.


What do you want to create?  If you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, do you want to keep that awful feeling and take it with you throughout the day?  If your co-worker is being a debbie-downer on a Monday morning, are you going to let that bother your day?  We are the creators of our own happiness.  And guess what? We get to enjoy that happiness!  When we are unified with the rest of the universe, we get to enjoy good health! When we open our hearts we get to see the beauty in everything and we get to experience more love in ourselves, in others, and in all that surrounds us.

Create your own happiness.  Be open to change.  Open yourselves to grace...on and off the mat.

Namaste :)

Thanks Marc and Nikki!
http://www.marcstpierre.com/index.html
http://nikkijacobsyoga.com/
http://dancingcrowyoga.com/events.php

Fall Vinyasa Flow Retreat - Keeping your practice with you

I went on a run in the rain yesterday in my little town and stopped when I heard rushing water falling over a dam.  I went over to the bridge and looked down...then closed my eyes. 

The beauty about yoga practice and meditation in general is that the more you practice, the more you carry it with you.  I was just fortunate enough to spend the weekend in Bartlett, NH with 13 beautiful women at Becky LeHoullier's Fall Vinyasa Flow Yoga Retreat.  A hike was planned by Jilly Sorrentino to the gorgeous waterfall pictured above, a discussion on Finding your Voice was lead by Yours Truly, vegetarian meals were cooked with love, a surprise "Yogi Yankee Swap" was planneed by Becky's mom, Jacky and of course Becky's flowing and flawless classes were the foundation of the trip. 
Work was forgotten about. Families were left at home (although we love and missed you!) Routine weekend obligations were put on the shelf to find a little space for "me".  Selfish? Read on.
During the "Finding your Voice" talk, people shared their experiences and stories of how they may have "radically expressed" themselves this year, or expressed themselves just a little more assertively than they may have in the past.  One woman mentioned that she had always been a controlling mother and it was the first summer she had learned to let go, take time off, and felt good about just having "me" time.  This trip was a reminder that it's okay to stop and find time to reset, rejuvenate and breathe. 

As I stood on that bridge yesterday with running water below my feet and rain falling all around me, I breathed deep.  I felt as if I was back at the falls in the mountains, thought about the conversations I had with new friends, the comaraderie that was developed, the trust that was born.  And I carried that feeling throughout the rest of my run.

In my personal yoga practice this morning, I found myself waking up thinking about the busy day ahead of me.  Instead of rushing to get ready or finding clothes to wear, I sat at the end of my bed, put a pillow behind my back and breathed into my mantra for 20 minutes.  Then I had a gorgeous 1/2 hour yoga practice.  When a thought came up, it was related to a new asana I had learned in Becky's class; it was a more focused thought on how my knee should be aligned over my ankle in this pose; it was remembering that in this space there should be a breath...instead of a thought. 
Retreats like this come and go.  But the healing that happened to our bodies....to our minds....even though we may not have realized we needed it - will last.  Maybe it will last a week. Maybe it will last just a day.  But I know I can go right to my mat tomorrow morning and do it all again.  It's always there for us.

Static

Recently in a Yogic Sutra class, our teacher mentioned, "We're all tuned in to a radio station, some kind of frequency....but most people are just tuned to the station that's static."

Practicing yoga, and I don't just mean practicing stretching, makes you aware of the static in which you live...and that's the hard part about this practice.  When you realize you're part of this constant buzz of thoughts, chaos, busy minds, it starts to hurt.  You can't wait to get away from it.  You start to become aware.

But how do you do get away?

Recently I visited a friend in Austin, TX.  I had been discovering the city all weekend.  There was so much chaos, so many people, so many superficial conversations....and I actually NEEDED it...needed to let loose after a stressful and hectic work week...but only for a day.  After a day, I wanted peace. I wanted quiet. I wanted to rest.  I tried to get my friend to come out for one more drink since we hadn't seen each other in over a year.  His answer? "I need to go home. I can't wait to get up and practice." I knew exactly what he meant. 

The searching, the socializing, looking for happiness outside of ourselves....it doesn't actually exist.  Well, it does, temporarily.  But to find ultimate happiness? Practice sitting or practice asanas (body postures) while deep breathing.  When a thought pops into your head, note that you had it, then let it go.  You might be able to stand 1 minute at first....then 5.  Eventually 15 minutes will seem like a breeze.  Maybe eventually you'll be like my friend, dedicated to practicing 1 hour and 1/2 every morning.

This is the practice I crave.  It makes me happy. When a conversation becomes too negative, too empty, I remember my practice and find solace there, and try to bring that tranquility and energy into my current situation.  I'm aware of the static, but I don't let it get to me.

After a long night's sleep, a massage, finally cooking a meal at home, and watching a local musician tell her story through song, the static is starting to drift away.... I can't wait for yoga tomorrow morning.

Om namah